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Member Since 31 Oct 2010
Offline Last Active Jul 10 2014 05:15 PM

#3411587 Awkward Sex Stories

Posted Shaylá on 03 August 2011 - 06:28 PM

I guess I´ll just start so it´s not that awkward for other people to post in here.

This is the story of how I lost my virginity, please dont laugh too hard ;)
I'm bi, so when I tell this story, I mean I was losing my STRAIGHT virginity... because I guess that could be a thing. My technical virginity and gay virginity was lost years earlier.
I was having a house party for my 21st birthday (Late bloomer? Perhaps. I've been the fat guy my whole life... confidence was always an issue for me) with my friends that weren't old enough to make it out to the bar with me. A month and a half prior, I had become friends with a group of girls who really liked to party. I had just started getting into the crazy party drunken scene (with my newly found confidence, I learned I could be the life of the party.)
One of these girls I had a bit of a thing for, but she was way out of my league. Like way out of my league. But newly found confidence, drunkeness, and the fact that if I "went for it" and was rejected, it wasn't like I was losing a friend from 10+ years ago, I just met her.
I set my sights that I was going to try and get with this chick. We made out a few times (well, a lot of people were making out with a lot of people, so it wasn't that weird... I think I made out with like fifteen girls and ten guys that night or something.) Eventually the night started slowing down, and she ASKS to come sleep in my bed with me.
I'm super nervous... it's like I was being pulled over by the cops... my drunk just instantly went away and I was just freaking out. Eventually, after making it blatantly obvious she wanted me to finger her and I just kept rubbing her stomach awkwardly, she grabs my hands and forces it into her pants. After she returned the favor and played with my member, and I ate her out, I awkwardly asked "should I get a condom?" After she replies yes... I think asked her about 3-4 times if she was sure. (I should note that while writing this, I'm continuously facepalming myself thinking about how ridiculous I was.)
I had been hosting quite a few parties over the past 6+ months, and learned how helpful having a community condom drawer was. Kind of like a give a penny/take a penny system. I didn't want my friends getting pregnant. I didn't want my friends getting an STD. I didn't want my friends getting stains... anywhere. So I reached into my community condom drawer, slid it on, and went to work.
The first thing I noticed was that it didn't feel nearly as awesome as I had imagined. Like... you spent your teen years fapping and imagining what a vag actually feels like... and then you're finally there, with a REALLY hot chick and it's like... meeeeeeh. Then, after a few minutes, I realize that it's not that it doesn't feel awesome... it's that I don't feel anything at all. Like, I couldn't feel my penis. (If the movie "Teeth" had been out at the time, I probably would have panicked.) So, not only was it my first time, but I also couldn't FEEL anything. I'm sure it was probably the worst sex she'd ever had.
While I have my dick in this hot chick... the only thing I'm thinking about is "oh my god, I must be gay. I thought I was bi this whole time because I've always found myself attracted to women moreso than men, but here I am having sex with a woman and I can't feel ANYTHING!" I figured I just had to be gay. She eventually made some noises that I'm sure had to be fake. I followed them up with some awkward kind of grunting. Then, after we shared a post-sex kiss... I told her I was going to go outside and have a smoke. I don't smoke, but I had a pack of mini-cigars for when I hang outside with people that do smoke. So I go outside and stand there, pretending to inhale, contemplating what life will be like as a gay man.
I eventually shuffle back into my room and we fall asleep together.
The next morning, in the light, I look at the floor and see the condom wrapper. It was a triple-thick desensitizing lubricated condom for guys with stamina problems.

#3408194 [StarCraft II] MLG Anaheim Discussion Thread

Posted friendliestguyonaj on 01 August 2011 - 09:15 PM

at first I was like
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but then
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#3408808 The "Funny Picture" thread

Posted xKodizzlex on 02 August 2011 - 04:42 AM

Keep on topic please.

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#3407747 [Music] What are you listening to?

Posted simplemind on 01 August 2011 - 04:00 PM

#3407552 The "Funny Picture" thread

Posted Shaylá on 01 August 2011 - 01:36 PM

for all se germanz:


#3406345 [IRL] Official OT IRL Picture's

Posted Xhanon on 31 July 2011 - 07:33 PM

Ill just leave this right here
Last school day, was alot of fun!

At LAN :shaman:

me when im bawsing

dont forget to +rep if you liked! B)

#3404430 [IRL] Official OT IRL Picture's

Posted Shaylá on 30 July 2011 - 05:28 PM


#3404441 [IRL] Official OT IRL Picture's

Posted friendliestguyonaj on 30 July 2011 - 05:35 PM


#3402481 [IRL] Official OT IRL Picture's

Posted Malevolént on 29 July 2011 - 05:21 PM

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Greetings from Germany :o

#3401673 League of Legends fanbois

Posted Scarra on 29 July 2011 - 04:30 AM


my penta made #1 on top 5 plays of the week

#3401724 [IRL] Official OT IRL Picture's

Posted Frostitutes on 29 July 2011 - 05:29 AM

You remind me of a younger Stephen Merchant

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#3401246 The "Funny Picture" thread

Posted xKodizzlex on 28 July 2011 - 11:47 PM

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#3400238 The "Funny Picture" thread

Posted xKodizzlex on 28 July 2011 - 03:19 PM

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#3398676 Americas got takent!

Posted Guest on 27 July 2011 - 05:00 PM

View Postmerker, on 27 July 2011 - 04:54 PM, said:

its time for bed
Also time for the...


#3398326 Spotify is a new way to listen to music

Posted vayqt on 27 July 2011 - 11:59 AM

People from Germany, Switzerland and Austria can use http://www.simfy.de/.