Goodnight and Good Luck ReedwisePublic Lies and Slander
Posted 29 December 2012 - 07:06 AM
My Dearest Reedwise,
I don't blame you for being interested in my life. I'd write about me too; however, exerting the time and energy that your peon-sized military mind shat out for me is quite flattering. You see, I'm far too busy finishing up my BA at a top 4 college and spelling out R-B-G to Blizzcon champions. A task that your measly, albeit hedonistic social networking skills couldn't hold a candle to. Moreover, I encourage you to provide evidence, concrete evidence mind you--not this D-List Perez Hilton meets Gomer Pyle horseshit, that anything physical occurred between my ex and yourself. Frankly, I'm 100% sure it didn't. Why? Well, the American Judicial system require more than mere horny, lonely military boy fantasies to render a verdict. I served for seven years in the Special Forces unit of the Salvation Army. I will judo chop your head in 0.37 seconds and feed it to the jury on a silver platter.
Katie won't be the first one, nor the last one to have provided "nude" images of herself to men online for attention. I'm humored that you held on dearly to said images for two years though. Maybe you were bedfellows and received action at Fort Lewis with that Uncleswag or whatever pervert that holds the imgur album of every single WoW girl in their glorious nudity. Furthermore, my ex-girlfriend was suffering from severe depression in her last weeks with me. She was bed-ridden, attempted her own suicide with an entire bottle of xanax, slashed at me with the sharpest kitchen knife, but I stayed by her side through it all, from dragging her to the bathroom ensuring she wouldn't choke on her vomit to sleeping bedside at the emergency room of Overlake hospital. Guess what the word for this most basic form of legal defense is? An alibi. Your fantasies conflict with actual fact cemented in medical and residential records. We never lived in Kent, Washington and I challenge you to promptly provide me the address of our previous residence. Shit. Giving a city that wasn't an hour off like your pack of shit story provided would be an improvement. During the last stages of our relationship the most she ever did was speak with you on Skype, and text message, and that's okay with me. We were moving our separate ways. And yet, I'd like you to know you're a notch below the ethics of your local child molester for publishing this filth on ArenaJunkies. Bragging about receiving a nude from a manic depressive suicide victim is like winning third prize at the sixth grade science fair. Congratulations you capitalized on another human being's weakness in her most vulnerable state. It makes you nothing more than an online predator, an author of second-rate slander, and an over-compensating douche. Maybe it impressed that collection of teenie-bopper sheep in your mediocre backwater bg guild--you know the ones that were incapable of succeeding High School English without plagiarism. Alas, your post leaves much to be desired to anyone educated with a smidgen of moral sense.
Troll on kiddo. I've already won because I'm indifferent to your pleas for attention and fabricated verbal diarrhea. The worst of my Nobel Laureate professors would have left you crying in a corner with PTSD nightmares. Remember. If you ever dream of beating me you better wake up and apologize.
p.s. Katie herself commented that you were painstakingly awkward and self-absorbed at phone sex. Seems like you know as much about fornicating women as those multi red-helmeted, Blizzcon Champion arena players knew about RBGs when my team curb-stomped them. Relax bro. I, World's R1 RBG Leader, Master of the Manhole, the Hero Azeroth deserves, Bailamos, can save you. Unfortunately, my schedule is packed and rush delivery will cost you at least $500 an hour. Something your military pension could not afford.
Posted 29 December 2012 - 07:14 AM
17 members, 25 guests, 3 anonymous users
Braindance, Disx, Pucklolz, smexybonez, Acoustics, Bailamosx, Zhand1, Animalcrackr, Rhoren75, Slipnslidejr, Slythor, Trant1022, Reedzlol, Poobandit, Qtpebble,hearthadinlol, Jamal
Posted 29 December 2012 - 07:17 AM
Posted 29 December 2012 - 07:18 AM
-The Cheshire Cat
Posted 29 December 2012 - 07:33 AM
Fuck you Vanguards.
Posted 29 December 2012 - 07:35 AM
Posted 29 December 2012 - 07:37 AM
I, World's R1 RBG Leader, Master of the Manhole, the Hero Azeroth deserves, Bailamos, can save you. Unfortunately, my schedule is packed and rush delivery will cost you at least $500 an hour. Something your military pension could not afford.
If Reed won third place at the science fair, you just won first place at the special olympics.
Posted 29 December 2012 - 07:40 AM
Edited by Bigmoran, 29 December 2012 - 07:42 AM.
bigmoran | bobrosslol | nextevelpvp
Posted 29 December 2012 - 07:46 AM
ur just beating off on the phone
edit: having sex with a phone would actually qualify as phone sex
Edited by Seu, 29 December 2012 - 07:47 AM.
Posted 29 December 2012 - 07:50 AM
Posted 29 December 2012 - 07:56 AM
Lvl 1 DK Legend Covlol
0 user(s) are reading this topic
0 members, 0 guests, 0 anonymous users